Afterword for him, should he ever read this.
Hi.
The probability that you’ll find this recount is astronomically small.
The probability that you’ll actually read and recognize yourself as its second protagonist is even smaller.
But on the off chance that you do. . .
Hi.
How are you?
It’s been six years. For a short while I kept in touch with people who knew you and they said you weren’t doing too well. I’m sorry to hear that. I’ve only ever wished you the best. And sometimes ‘the best’ hurts us in certain ways, asking us to stop running from the pain and face it, see what it asks of us.
Does that even make sense to you? I don’t think this whole masculine-feminine shadow work thing is on your radar. Because I still remember when you told us about that doctor-to-be who couldn’t bring himself to write his essay. You didn’t know how to help him, and I didn’t yet know the words for, “Sounds like he has a feminine system. He can’t be forced to write when the essay isn’t ready to be written yet.”
You probably don’t remember that. You probably don’t remember me either. It’s funny how two people can share the same experience with each other, but it can impact one of them for life while the other forgets it.
Oh, don’t feel guilty. There’s no need for that.
You’ve impacted my life in ways I can never fully verbalize, and guess what—you just needed to be yourself to do that! You didn’t need to be anything else, do anything else. It was all perfect. I never could’ve imagined that meeting you would launch this earthquake through my life, resurface my traumas, and lead me back to my innermost power. You helped me unlock the deadbolts suffocating my heart. You led me back to my soul, even back then in 2018. No amount of money or thanks could ever repay that. But energy bounces back, and you’ve inspired a literal supernova of high frequency energy! You’ll be alright, if you dare open and receive from life as well.
You probably don’t want to hear that, but you’ll come around to that lesson eventually.
You’ve immortalized yourself in my life either way. You’re one of the big threads my journey leads back to, so whenever someone asks what inspired me to walk the path of body work, my answer is you.
I can’t think of a more beautiful conclusion to this story.
Does that horrify you? If I had to guess, at least that cocky part of you is turned on.
Didn’t have this planned out as a goal in your life, hm? But hey, you’re one of the few men who get the chance to read the woman’s point of view in their “We were kinda attracted to each other, but nothing came of it” situation! That’s pretty cool!
If you take anything from this into your body, then that you’re so much more impactful than you believe. In fact, you have quite the powerful channel. You’re not a creator for nothing in your field of work! The dark voice convincing you of the opposite isn’t actually you. It tells you you’re not good enough, young enough, fit enough, for whatever it is you desire, but it talks bullshit.
You can turn your life for the better whenever you want. It’ll take you to face buried emotions, but they’re less scary than they seem. You don’t have to do it alone either.
Wherever you're at in your life right now, I wish you to live according to your fullest expression.
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